You know, ladies and gentledudes - ever since I've started this website (the second time... long story, lets not go there) I have not written a single thing on my blog page. And I really do want to have a blog - I've made a button for it and everything... I mean... what the heck? In my mind I was on my way to winning the blogger's pulitzer prize or something like that.
And then I tried to write.
Yeah... that didn't go very well for me. I tried to write about anything I could think of. I tried introducing myself in my first blog since a friend of mine tole me that my readers would like to know more about me. Unfortunately I turned out to be a rather dull subject. In a way it was a rather learning experience - I learned that most people have more interesting life than the one I lead. Yay!
After giving up on my life (figuratively speaking) I tried to write about my hobbies or things that I find interesting and fun. Then I thought about it and... who the heck wants to read about me having sex? Plus... that'd be like... a really short blog and everything. You'd read it all in under two minutes... kinda sad really. If you ARE interested though... I have this short story called "The Evil Comic Writer and the Teenage Japanese Schoolgirls (of legal age)". Then again you might want to wait for the movie to come out. Better... uhm... representation of the artist's vision. Yeah... that.
Then I thought of writing about the many many things I have mastered over the years: zombie survival (hey... you see any zombie eating me right now?), video games, uhm... some other stuff... MANY other stuff even. In fact I have mastered so many stuffs I can't even remember them all. That's how awesome I am. Unfortunately turned out there are better sites at reviewing video games (fuck you gamespot!) and there's this guy who wrote a survival guide in case of a zombie breakout and he stole all of my ideas ( I'm looking at you Max Brooks!). So once again I was left beating my desk with the frontal portion of my head. Man... those pain killers sure make you fuzzy afterwards... but in a good way!
And just like that - I was in writers limbo. A horrible horrible place where twilight fan-fiction writers go off to die. Or to mate... both equally horrifying I guess...
To say I was climbing walls would be an understatement. I wanted to write! To let myself be heard! To spread my infinite wisdom onto the masses! Instead writing a single page seemed to be as impossible as... I don't know... scoring with Emma Watson... on the fucking everest! Well... to be honest I won't give up on my hopes for some Hermione action so lets just call it improbable. Impossible is such a strong word. Just you wait... it will happen!
To be honest - at some point I sort of gave up. I hung up my... uhm... pen (?!), threw in the towel and cried my self to sleep for weeks upon weeks unable to write a single word. I gained like... 20 pounds and began watching soap operas. Not the best time of my life, I'll tell you that.
What broke my dry streak you must ask? Well believe it or not - it all just kinda fell together after me being sick. Yes children, if you suck at something - just get some hostile organisms inside you and you'll be doing great in no time!
It all began yesterday. I had a super bad day. I was sick, I think I had fever (I didn't actually have enough energies to waste on measuring my temperatures), my head felt as if it was just raped by a jackhammer and my throat felt as if... it was just raped by a jackhammer. Due to money being tight I had just finished a full day of work, and came home to a house full of chores to be done. My girlfriend was sick as well so she wasn't much help and all the chores fell on me (even though she did make me Irish tea... minus the Irish part) .
Some time later I half collapsed half sat down in front of my desk, having almost no strength left to be standing. There and then I found myself exausted, staring at a blank sheet of paper. For reasons I can not yet explain - I picked up a pen and began writing.
I wrote this very own blog you're reading right now. If it seems that I'm speaking here in some oddly placed past tense - it's cause I began writing it yesterday and am finishing it up... well... now. Duh!
I'm still sick so the only reasonable conclusion I came up with is that high fever and low brain activity must have somehow triggered my hidden writing powers who have now taken over. Fuck me if I know how - I'm not a botanologist damn it! It's like that episode in Friends where Phoebe (the annoying one) got the flue and could suddenly sing... it just happened.
Now don't get me wrong, I'm not claiming to have written the next best thing since Playboy over here (hey hey hey... there are some pretty fine articles over there!). I know it's just a silly little blog and yes, I am aware htat I had just wrote about having nothing to write about. But to me here, this here is my first small step on a long awkward journey. Because after a long time - I managed to write something. No matter how silly - to me it's awesome.
So... I think I'll finish it up right about here, but I'm quite certain that I'll manage to write more blogs in the very near future. Also - today the Reaper of Souls is coming out so expect the next blog to be about Diablo.
Yours truly, Bad Example.
Jay Wilson sucks!